will you hold your finger here so i can tie a nice neat bow?

Almost five months have unraveled, leaving only ten paper chain links until home. The month of June has been filled with “lasts” and “goodbyes” to both relationships and adventures. Since the 18^th of June, friends have gradually been packing their overly warn t-shirts, kiwi branded souvenirs and broken-in boots, while trying to unpack their last five months spent in NZ. As I am not leaving for ten more days, I have been walking with dozens of friends through the leaving process and have been reflecting on patterns I’ve seen within each goodbye. We all want goodbyes to be extravagant, the final peak to an ever-building adventure. We want one final night, one final adventure, one final word that will tie a shiny satin ribbon around an experience we have been building over the past months. But goodbyes are not neat and tidy. Instead they are haggard and discombobulated. Filled with emotions, flowing in unrhythmic and unstoppable waves; nervous, excited, scared, anxious, tears, laughter, deep sorrow, heart-felt appreciation, riveting joy, cutting regret, invited anticipation. Each person embodies a different feeling at different time, leading to mismatched hugs of clashing sentiment. Endings are often just as awkward as beginnings, the initial introductions- thick emotions that won’t fit in the space between an initial handshake. Yet it isn’t the goodbye that matters, the ribbon will be untied and it is the present we get to keep, the laughter, the memories, the adventure. Those things that can’t be polished and won’t be tainted through “an amazing last night” or the “perfect goodbye.” So I’ll continue to walk through the next ten days trying to stop my ribbon-tying tendencies, knowing that I have had an indescribable experience that can’t be touched. Knowing that with the end of one adventure, a new one begins. Maybe it won’t have the glorious title, but sometimes the joys hidden in the pockets of ordinary days are the sweetest.

summer sledding

So, winter has come. Nights drop below freezing as flakes dust the surrounding peaks (literally dust, with enough snow to make anxious ski-legs ache, but not enough to save skies from deeply etched battle wounds given by rocks without mercy). Regardless of the inches, we were determined to find and fully enjoy a New Zealand winter in June… Off to Mt. John we traveled, to the beautiful Lake Tekipo, where there were no sleds, skies or other snow toys to rent. We had touched the snow and were not giving up, so we improvised, each with a mission to find a “sled.” Both the sheet of metal and the plastic sign worked like a dream, sending us ripping down the most beautiful sled hill in the world. There is something about playing in the snow that makes me feel like I'm cheating…its cold yet I'm out loving life, and in late June the same winter thrill exists! It was wonderful.

My sledding adventure was followed up by a ski trip! I drove up to Mt. Hutt, which basically driving ¾ up a mountain, where a ski field exists above the tree line, fully exposed to all the wind and all the weather New Zealand can deliver. Apparently, it hadn’t delivered much snow lately, but the views from the top of the peak far outweighed the freshest and deepest of powder (maybe?). From the peaks tip I could see all the southern alps on one side and the Canterbury plans (extremely flat farmland), the ocean and up and down a few hours drive along the island. It was unbelievable. Seeing the ocean from the ski hill is something I never knew was possible. New Zealand never ceases to amaze me.

six butts, one seat...

so, I have been living in New Zealand, Flat 16, for almost five months and decided i should introduce you the other five students who i share a flat, kitchen, tv, toilet and many cultural flat dinners... I decided to let them introduce themselves...

Hello America,

I am Nikolas from the beautiful Black Forest in Germany. You might not know where that is, because our VIPs are not Ali G., who is often compared with me, or Austin “Danger” Powers, whose Mojo I poses, but even more sophisticated personalities like the nameless inventor of the Black Forest Cake. So I hope you understand that coming to New Zealand was a cultural shock for me. Nevertheless I started to enjoy the company of sweet little sheep and wooly Annika. I will miss them.

Come to Germany, it’s “nice” - noooot!

Hello world,

I am Pubudu, a flat mate of Annika’s. I am originally from Sri Lanka though I have lived in Europe before coming to New Zealand. I have been in NZ for about 9 years and I’m the most “kiwi” flatter here. I study physics because I’m pretty much too lazy to do anything else. When I’m not dealing with symmetries and unitary matrices I play this crazy game called cricket, which I’m not going to even attempt to explain. Wikipedia knows all. Not much else to say or do, until 2009, when a friend and I will be driving from somewhere in Thailand to Calais, hope to see you all along the way.

This is Jake from Texas. I normally go to a military college in Virginia so coming to New Zealand for the semester was a nice breather. After these last few exams I will be Junior. I was the young one in the flat at 19. I love the relaxed atmosphere here in NZ. Its common for kiwis to go to the store or other public places barefoot. Kiwis are still in love with the mullet. The outdoor activities here are amazing. I’ve experienced some sailing, diving, rock climbing, whitewater rafting, caving, absailing and enjoyed every thrilling moment.

Hi everyone, my name is Neil. I come from a country which can be reached by just dig a deep hole through the core of the Earth from USA. I have been living in New Zealand for five years and this is the last year for my degree. Everyone who comes here would love the great scenery of “Middle-Earth” and the relax life styles. Lastly, Welcome you all to the 2008 Olympic Games.

(more from Nikolas about Colleen…)

Colleen, our beloved flat mother.

When I first arrived in the flat it was dark and grey, but then I met Neil. And it was still dark and grey. But after changing my traveling clothes (30h flight) and taking a shower, Annika and Colleen surprised me in the hallway and my life started to make sense again. Because this article is not about Annika, I stop writing about her. Colleen, born in the middle of nowhere in the beautiful state of Washington is a feminist science student, enjoying her time in New Zealand. I gonna miss her because she established a working community, supporting it with her fabulous cookies, brownies and cakes. I will also miss her Peanut

Cookies.

To all my flatmate, it has been an amazing semester and always a comforting place to come home to. I will miss you all!

LIVE: "His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama"

"Dalai Lama is a Mongolian title meaning 'ocean of wisdom'. Tibetans believe that the Dalai Lama is an enlightened being, who has chosen rebirth as a way to be of benefit to all living beings."

The Dalai Lama was dressed in traditional wear, and began his speech by making a joke about how he was hoping the rain would cancel the speech, so he could have a holiday, using his friendly, light-hearted personality to capture the audience. Hundreds of people stood, umbrellas overhead, took in the words of “His Holiness the 14^th Dalai Lama.” His main focus of the first speech was about peace. (note: the recap is my interpretation of what he said, from memory and a few soggy notes)

He discussed how the idea of war was outdated. How our world was too connected, each person being someone’s neighbor, people all over the world are the same and war was no longer necessary or productive means to end a conflict. Instead he emphasized the importance of dialogue, forgiveness and compassion. That these skills and values should be taught by families in the home and also within the schools setting. People need to learn to use dialogue to appropriately express feelings and come to resolutions. He also discussed the idea of taking a step back from situations in order to give it perspective, when focused in to close, anything will look big, but with a step back, the problem will shrink. To do this will require us to open our minds, to see problems from other perspectives and approach them with compassion.

He talked about how in we need to weary of negative emotions. When our negative emotions combine with human intelligence and new technology, our emotions can be amplified and causes can be extremely deadly.

I loved the way that the Dalai Lama approached other people. He has obvious very strong faith beliefs and value system, but never did he seem use his faith as the introduction to conversation with people. Instead he would talk to people about human emotion, the mind and other universal concepts. Engaging in dialogue with various people about universal concepts brought genuine interest by both parties and allowed each person to learn from the other and provided a foundation for further depth of conversation.

(a caption from a press release on the event) ‘Caring for others and demonstrating compassion ar the best means of achieving happiness for oneself’, he said, continuing that this was a belief Buddhism shared with Christianity, all other theistic traditions, and even atheism.

Most of what the Dalai Lama discussed was a reminder of what we have all learned over the years. The most impact part for me was to be standing among the thousands of people who were seeking change. The Dalai Lama said the usual “each individual can make a difference” and those common words had a new meaning when I looked around and saw thousands of people who were seeking to make a difference as well. It showed how much can change when people come together, that it isn’t just my individual contribution, but thousands and thousands want to integrate more compassion into their life, to see more unity and peace around the world.

"Every human being is a member of humanity and the human family, regardless of differences in religion, culture, colour and creed. "

"I am serving our cause with the motivation of service to humankind, not for reasons of power, not out of hatred. Not just as a Tibetan, but as a human being my mission is the propagation of true kindness, genuine kindness and compassion".

Sydney

I have never loved cities, after a few days, I would crave fresh air, mountains, trees and quiet. Somehow, Sydney captured my heart! I loved it! It was a place full of life, movement, activity. There was a jazz festival, which had about seven artist each day, playing at four outdoor venues- providing phenomenal people watching and lazy afternoons in Darling Harbor. We spent two days (the only two sunny days) on Bondi Beach, slightly south of the city. Bondi is a famous surfer beach and popular summer destination. Although the weather was turning to winter, we were still able to watch surfers dominate the sea, while the sea seemed to dominate us as we tried our own luck surfing. We’d then run back to our hostel, barefoot and freezing into a hot hostel shower that made the twenty-dollars a night truly worth it. We then traveled to the Blue Mountains, which were gorgeous and truly looked blue due to the eucalyptus tree bark. Back in the city we spent a few nights on the town, countless hours wandering the streets, stopping for live music performances, small-circus street acts, a handful of outdoor markets. We also had the chance to watch on of dozens of foreign film from the Film Festival that was taking place. We watched a movie on the Four Elements, an artistic and interesting film played inside a ornate theater that used to show black and white, non-talking pictures.

If that wasn’t enough, when we arrived we found out that the Dalai Lama was in town and giving a free speech within the Botanical Gardens. Regardless of the rain (we experienced the worst weather Sydney has had in five years) we went to the venue. And were inspired by his words of peace, compassion and hope for transformation of the future. (for more on his talk, check out upcoming blog to be posted in the next day or two). After the Dalai Lama spoke, there was a free concert consisting of five artist/bands from Sydney (Ben Lee, Lior, Jen Cloher and the Endless Sea, Mia Dyson and one other whose name I forgotten). Because of the rain, most people had cleared out, leaving a scattered few as the artist took the stage. Soaked to the bone, we decided to stay, but would have to pretend as though we were each artist biggest fan and dance wildly to get blood pumping back into our frozen bodies. So we danced, with little inhibition, wearing plastic ponchos or wrapped in blankets, twirling and bouncing to the beats. Those around us began to dance too. I will never forget twirling on muddy field, soaking wet, surrounded by passionate strangers, in the middle of Sydney, listening to inspiring music after hearing the Dalia Lama speak. Needless to say, Caitlin, Krissy and I closed the concert down and enjoyed every minute of it.

When someone says "Australia" most people picture golden sand beaches, tropical waters and kangaroos... well, that is Aus in the summer, it is winter here now and we were greated by a rainstorm! Born and raised in Oregon, i was hardly phased. We have spent some soggy days wandering the city, checking out the Jazz Festival, Film Festival and are going to hear the Dali Lama speak today. The sun even came out for a few days, got some surfing in and hiked around the Blue Mountains! It has been a BLAST so far and i expect nothing less for the next few days!

I'm off to Australia! Found cheap tickets and leaving in 10 minutes!!! I'll be sure to update my adventures when i return!

Navy Robes and Square Hats... smile.

First on my mind tonight is my brother. Lars graduates from LOHS this week and I’m so bummed I’m missing it. For those of you who don’t know Lars, he is a STUD. An adventurous, faith pursuing, athletic, hilarious, strong willed, gentle hearted man (yeah your eighteen now!). He is one of my best friends and someone who I love spending time with. I feel blessed to have him in my life and know that he constantly blesses those he encounters. I loved my senior year of high school. Lars was a freshman and we got to hang out every day, making lunches, early morning dancing in the kitchen with dad, walking to school, spring-time badminton tournaments-where I’d let him beat/dominate me and all the times in between. Since then it has been fun to have a brother that transforms from a sibling into a friend. Lars, I’m so excited for your next adventure ahead. Congratulations on graduation. Your accomplishments and impact on LOHS is something to be admired. I love you.

late nights unraveling

Lately I have been loving the dark and quiet hour from midnight till one. I have found myself spending this time in reflection. I spend all day feeling, experiencing, suppressing, expressing. It is in this hour that I begin to unravel the day. Looking into how I’m doing, I’ll begin to type, writing whatever comes to my mind, often typing faster than I realize what it is that I’m thinking. And there has been tons going on. I’ve been looking at what parts of my day bring me life and what parts of the day take it away. I feel like I have this final month in New Zealand where I will be living in a unique dynamic where challenges and new situations are constantly arising, but they are coupled with time and space for reflection. In my late night hours, I have found small conclusions and life changing ones as well.

- I learned that I need fifteen minute transitions. After a long day, I need time to decompress, sit, to listen to a song, eat a carrot, to feel like I can do whatever I want, even if it is only for a few minutes.

- I learned that I love people, I love to live within a place were there is action, life, lots of people moving, laughing, living. It doesn’t matter who they are, if I’m friends with them or not, I love to feel life around me.

- Yet within that space, I need my own space.

- I need regular challenges, physical and mental. More than an occasional jog, that mean gut-wrenching pointless three-hundred repeats at the track or hour plus long runs, fifty push-ups, hanging on the edge of a rock wall, or hours of hiking uphill at a unnecessary pace.

- I need consistent reflection, unloading of thoughts and ideas- weather to a person (preferably) or to a journal; otherwise I get overloaded and literally weighted down to the point where I begin to function through life instead of joyfully live it.

- I really appreciate and need to people pursue me personally, asking me questions about life-and challenging my responses.

- I love eating breakfast alone, love eating lunch with close friend or acquaintance) and love eating dinner with lots of people.

- Although I am messy, I function better when my stuff is organized.

- I need outlets where I can act like a giddy seven-year old. Places where I can “big –foot run” down hills with snow shoes, where I can dress in 80’s clothes and rock to the beat, go to a huge empty field and dribble a soccer ball-full speed-shoot on an invisible goalie- inevitably score and do a victory dance while others on look with suspicion. Times were I can freeze ice-cubes to the bottom of my shoes and skate down grass hills. Play spades and get unnecessarily excited about a victory and filled to the brim with bad words that I want to spew at my opposite when I am defeated. Turn up music and twirl. Run full-speed down scree fields and sand dunes. Log roll, sing “boom-chicka-boom”, eat more cookie dough than cookies. Compile the ten dorkiest hand motions and use them as frequently as possible. (stir the pot, self-high five, air punches, holding ones own hands and victoriously double shaking them on either side of their face, any movement that is accompanied by the sound “cha-ching,” and the list goes on…)

I previously wrote about living authentically and how that is both worship and a testament to God. I realize that to live authentically, I need to know who I am. The list complied above is the beginning of what it looks like for me to live as me. Evidence of my needs, my passions, my gifts and my weaknesses, can all be found woven in the list above, beginning to paint a picture of authenticity.