“Freedom of Speech.” Familiar words, yet unfamiliar in practice. I am not discussing the ability to say whatever one wants, but the actual freedom that comes from speaking. Issues, struggles, heartache, we’ve all got them yet we walk on the tippy-toes of life, hoping our brokenness will sneak past people. We wear baggy shirts to hide our too-large tummies, drink coffee to mask our exhaustion, smile and flirt to hide broken hearts. Never feeling we are good enough, if only we could be smarter, wiser, have more self-control, smaller nose, fewer freckles, love better, be
loved. We judge ourselves, holding the bar higher than we ever expect from others and then we feel guiltily for judging ourselves and guilty for having issues.
As I continually gain courage, I continue to share my issues. Speaking about them has brought an unbelievable freedom. By taking about my issues and naming them, I take away there power. They are no longer this ugly thing that I spend time an energy trying to ignore. Instead they becomes tangible, something I can own, instead of them owning me. We were created to be in community, to “confess our sins to one-another.” Healing and change can only begin after the wound or brokenness is identified.
There is an unexplainable power in verbalizing your human imperfections, struggles and sins. I have found such freedom each time I share. Freedom. Honest freedom from the crap that we attempt to ignore but instead consumes. Freedom from the fear that “if they only knew my crap, they wouldn’t stick around.” “I wouldn’t be loved, if they only knew...” Do you know what it feels like? I’m not suggesting we hang our dirty laundry for all to see, but to seek a safe place and unload. I have been amazed at how many people have the same struggles. And have find community, compassion, support and a lightness from sharing secrets. I can’t explain it, but I have found honest, soul liberating, freedom in speech.
2 comments:
Your thoughts always encourage me. Broadcasting our sins, struggles and fears is probably the hardest thing to do. Allowing ourselves to be vulnerable to others is completely counter intuitive within this system of image and success we have been made victim by. Releasing our death grip and letting the things we hide flow from us, from our identity, is at the essence of what it means to be free. May God grant us all the courage to take another step in that direction!
It is so good to read your writing. I was able to pul a lot of hope and peace from your words. Thank you for them. I hope you are doing well, and that life is as beautiful as ever. I look forward to seeing you sometime soon!
Post a Comment